So, you can’t find your keys, your phone or your
glasses…again. You go into another room
and can’t remember why. At the store you
have the feeling that you’ve forgotten something. You call your grandson three or four other
family or pet names before you land on the right one. Your wife is visibly frustrated because you’ve
asked the same question at least twice in the past few days.
Is it age related? ADD? What?
As a professional who helps adults
with ADD manage their day-to-day lives, I frequently hear comments to the
effect “doesn’t everyone have a little ADD?” The answer to that question is, thankfully,
no. Adults with diagnosed ADD, a serious
neuro-genetic disorder of development, struggle every day to keep their jobs,
relationships and self-esteem from crumbling, not just on occasion. In addition to chronically losing their keys
and glasses, they wrestle with a multitude of serious cognitive challenges. The key word is “chronic.”
Faulty memory or lack
of attention? It’s more likely that
you’re suffering from a simple case of “mindlessness”, spacing out or
autopilot. You’re really not paying
attention to what’s going on around you. Being on autopilot allows the brain to
preserve mental energy as we perform habits by rote. For example you come into the house from the
car with your arms full from shopping and put everything on the kitchen
counter. Later you need to run an
errand. Where are your keys? Hanging up, in your pocket, coat, purse, under
the bags, in the ignition? In getting
the jumble of bags from the car to the kitchen, it’s likely that you were not
paying attention to where you put your keys. When you finally locate them you do a mental
head-slap having remembered putting them “there” for safe-keeping.
Multi-tasking is a wonderful misnomer or myth about being
able to do many things at once. It makes
us feel like we’re accomplishing a lot in a short period of time. Racing around, we feel efficient and
productive. Turns out it’s a real
attention-distractor. In reality we’re
shifting our attention really quickly from one activity to another, and really
not doing anything well. Talking on the
phone while moving from room to room to pick up clutter, dust or even get a
snack is almost a guarantee that you’ll put the phone down for “just a minute”
and forget where you left it.
Stress, boredom or lack of sleep can make your forgetfulness
seem worse at times. These issues can
cloud your reaction time and clarity of thought. If focus is difficult it may be that you’re
getting too much static (stress) on your brain’s channels. Take notice of when you feel more
scattered. Are you expecting out-of-town
guests who put a lot of pressure on you to entertain them, or are you dealing
with aging parents? Do you have too much
spare time and no specific purpose or schedule? That may lead to a “lazy” brain. Without the stimulation of daily
decision-making and problem solving the brain becomes accustomed to checking
out and will be harder to rally when the need arises. And the biggest contributor to lack of
attention or focus is a sleep-deprived brain. Sleep problems are getting more and more attention
as studies reveal the significant negative impact lack of sleep has on adult
performance in the areas of memory, learning and focus. Insomnia, sleep apnea and snoring are all
sleep interrupters that should be addressed with your physician.
A simple way to reduce
incidents of forgetfulness. In the
last few years the practice of mindfulness has played a greater role in
learning how to quiet your mind, side-step distractions, focus on the present
and improve your cognitive functioning. Here
are some easy steps for incorporating this tool into your life:
·
Stop in-the-moment and noticing what’s going on
around you;
·
Notice what you’re noticing;
·
Pay attention to what and where your attention
is going in the moment: when you take your keys out of the car, stop and
mindfully notice what you do next with them. Sit for a moment and let it sink
in.
·
Do one thing at a time. “When I get out of the
car, I will stop and put my keys in my left coat pocket.”
·
Pay close attention to your surroundings, the
smells, lighting, temperature in order to jog your memory in multiple
ways. “I remember putting them in my
left coat pocket because I recall the smell of the garage.”
·
Carry a small notepad and pen to jot down ideas
as they come to mind, or tasks to be addressed.
·
Forget about always trying to retrieve your
thoughts at a later date, that’s too much stress.
·
If the weight of your thoughts keeps you from
getting or staying asleep, park them in your notepad. You’ll be taking a mindful step toward holding
onto ideas that you can act on if you choose to.
The next time that you find your memory slipping, try practicing
mindfulness. It doesn’t require a class,
lots of instruction or an electronic gadget. It comes from within so it’s free for you to
tap into anytime, anywhere. It’s a great
way to train your brain to be more efficient, focused and less stressed.
